Aligned & Soulful Success | Guiding high-achieving women of color to succeed through their soulful purpose
Welcome to “Aligned & Soulful Success”
My name is Kavita Melwani, I am a Intuitive Success Coach with two decades of experience as an entrepreneur and a decade as a coach.
I want to personally welcome you to the “Aligned & Soulful Success,” where my vision is to empower as many high-achieving first/second-generation immigrants as possible to succeed through their soulful purpose. I want you to confidently and opulently shine authentically, knowing that you are on your divinely guided path.
Together, we will explore multicultural women's challenges as they balance cultural expectations, responsibilities, and familial roles while fulfilling and finding their soul’s purpose.
I truly believe that if you do your inner work and take aligned action, the ripple effect changes the world.
"it is possible to bridge the success you already have with the truest, soulful, mystical parts of yourself.
Are you ready to rise up into your purposeful success?
I have heard from so many friends, clients, and other entrepreneurs that there just isn't enough time to finish everything. I am guilty of saying this exact thing and a lot of the things that I discuss in this episode.
In this episode of Aligned and Soulful Success, I discuss:
Some external strategies to manage your time.
How to honestly discern your priorities.
How your childhood may be impacting your time management.
Why the fear of achieving your dreams and success might be impacting your productivity.
How the human desire to belong impacts what you accomplish.
Why scarcity mindset, people pleasing, and perfectionism all contribute to your feeling that there isn't enough time.
If you want to contact me with what you took away today OR a topic you want to hear more about. Contact me here
Welcome to Aligned and Soulful Success. My name is Kavita, and I come to you each week to discuss topics that have to do with success for empathic and conscious entrepreneurs. So this episode, I'm continuing my series on the inner workings of running the business, which is basically what's going on in your mind, the inner game. And so one thing that I've heard a lot from my clients, from friends, and actually recently in an event I went to, was that there's just not enough time to finish all the things that I wanna finish and to do all the things that I want to do. And I hear this specifically and more often from entrepreneurs, and I think that this is a lot to do with what is going on in our minds, into our subconscious minds and our conscious minds, and a little less to do with actual time management techniques. So I do teach clients, uh, about actual external strategies to manage their time better. And, you know, I discuss things such as time blocking, prioritizing your tasks, and even doing some time tracking. And so if you haven't done some of those things, I would recommend you, you try them. So especially time tracking, even though that's kind of a painful process for some people, it really involves you keeping track of how you spend every 15 minutes of your day. Okay? And so every 15 to 20 minutes, you, you write down what you have done in the last 15 to 20 minutes. And so you do this for a few days, probably a week. It will give you an idea of how you're spending your time, and you can use that information in so many ways to improve how you spend your time, maybe moving things around, um, where can you block time, even prioritizing, uh, starting the day with a task that you least wanna do that you just keep moving, but are really high priority. So those are just some quick examples of how you can use, uh, time tracking, prioritizing, and time blocking. Now, I do teach a lot more on time management, but today I wanna talk more about that inner part of time management. And so once you actually start to look at how you're spending your time, maybe try some time blocking, try prioritizing. You may notice that those strategies take you a certain to a certain point, but there seems to be that sense that, oh, I am still not
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Finishing everything that I wanna finish. Okay? And so then we need to start looking at what is our mindset? What are our thoughts? What are the subconscious conditioning that we have about time? And how is that impacting? How will we choose to spend our time, what we choose to focus on in each moment, and even what we finish? Okay? And so, starting with really looking and being honest with yourself of how you are spending your time. Once you are honest with yourself, you'll notice that there are certain things that you spend a lot of time doing, and those things are really your priority. So you may say, oh, my priority is your business, right? For instance. But if what you're doing is spending a lot of time on, let's say, doing things around your house, and then that is obvious to someone just looking at how you're spending your time, that that's a higher priority for you. So be honest of how you're spending your time. And instead of coming it from looking at how you spend your time from that mindset of how can I make this better? How can I get more done? Instead, look at it from the angle of, well, I'm actually prioritizing these things that I'm spending the most time with. So maybe you, you didn't consciously prioritize them, but they are important to you for some reason. Okay? So checking in with that internal compass of what is really important to you. And if those things that are important to you do not match how you're spending your time, then you ask yourself, why, why do I think that doing things around the house is more important than working on my business? Now, that that may not be an easy answer, right? Some of that may be because I can actually control what goes on in my house and my business feels like I have less control. Maybe the those things are on your house feels easy, and you can actually finish them. And so you feel a sense of accomplishment where you may not be feeling that in your business. So those are just, that's just an example of how going through this process of really checking in on your mindset and your thought patterns can uncover some of those things, right? And so then the next time you are going to do something around your house instead of something that you really need to do in your business, you can stop yourself and say, oh, am I feeling this lack of control? Am I feeling concerned about what the results are when I do this? Am I feeling the need to feel that sense of security? Why am I choosing to do this instead? Or it may just be like, you know, you just don't feel like doing it right so that that can be there too. And often we forget that no matter what you choose as your career, as your business, there will be tasks that you don't like, that you don't enjoy, right? And so I know that the goal eventually with most of the entrepreneurs that I've worked with and myself, is to be able to outsource those things that we don't enjoy, and that that can happen in the meantime. There's still gonna be things in your business that you don't enjoy, and there may be things that you usually enjoy, but right now just maybe not feel like doing, right? So it's important to recognize when that's happening and notice what's happening. And so sometimes that can occur just because we're human, okay? Other times it can occur because you're not giving yourself enough time off or breaks. You may not be celebrating your accomplishments. There can be that as well. So you can ask yourself, what's the truth here? Is it that I'm not acknowledging what I have done? Is it that I'm not celebrating my wins? Is it that I'm not giving myself that self-validation? Or is it just like, I just don't feel like doing this? Right? So being clear and honest with yourself and then doing it anyway if it's important to you. Okay? So then this idea of you can do the external pieces to improve how you spend your time, and then if it's still not helping you move forward and you're not spending the time, your time in the way that you like, then that's the truth of what's important to you and what's truly your priority. And you start to look at what you're spending your time with, and why are you choosing to choose to spend your time on those things instead? And what are the beliefs and what, what does that bring you? Why are you choosing that instead? Right? What's the benefit of choosing that over what is what you've said is your higher priority? And in the case of the, the cleaning, it's like, that feels more secure. I can see the results of that, and so I feel more productive. Okay? And so then going further into that inner landscape when it comes to time management is the idea of scarcity and the words you use is much very much related to scarcity. So the scarcity mindset is there's just never enough time, right? Do you see time that way? Are you a person when someone asks you how things are, is it that I never finish anything or I don't have enough time to finish everything that I wanna do, where there just is enough time? Do you talk about how time is passing by quickly? I mean, I know I do that all the time. I'm guilty of doing those things. I ha there's a lot of, uh, moments where I'm, I look and I say, I
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Can't, can't believe it's already April, right? How did, how did this happen so quickly? It feels like it passed by so fast. And so I know that that is some the experience that you're having, right? And the thing is, you have the experience and then you have what you tell yourself about it. So if you really look at it, you did actually experience each and every day from this year. If I look at, yes, it's April, and a lot has happened in the last three plus months, right? If I really look at all the things that have happened, so I can tell myself that it's passing by quickly, but I really am starting to, sometimes I'll go back to my phone and look at the pictures of, of the last few months, and then I'll realize all the things that I have experienced. It keeps me a little bit more present and grounded into what's happening and the reality of it, instead of believing those words that I'm saying, right? Cause the words have power. Okay? So what are you saying about your time? Are you using words that are more of like a scarcity mindset? Okay? What is it that you are saying? How do you talk about time? And then taking that even further. What do you really believe about time? What is the truth about time to you? And you can even go back to your conditioning and say, well, and see how time was demonstrated in your household, and what are those truly beliefs? And how can you work on those beliefs that you have about time? And if you can work on those beliefs and those thought patterns, then you can shift how, how ti your experience of that in your life. And so there's a, there's a, a, a couple more things I wanted to talk about when it comes to this, and that is fears, perfectionism, and even the, the idea of success. Okay? So that could fall under fears as well. So another reason that you may be not getting things done is because you're, you have some fears that may or may not be conscious. And these fears are about what will happen if you actually take the steps towards achieving your dreams and goals. What if they actually happen? Then what, what will, what will that experience be like? What if that experience isn't what I expected, right? And so this idea that there's a fear that's underneath actually accomplishing your goals, okay? And then there may even be a fear of the success that you may achieve and what the consequences of success are. Maybe you're part of some groups of people that are also kind of starting out, or, you know, you kind of bond with the struggle that you're experiencing. And so that if you experience the success, then you may no longer feel like you belong in that group, right? And so the, I'm not saying that this is conscious, these are usually subconscious ways that we behave. And so what I'm asking you to do is to really look inward and be honest with yourself. What is the truth here, right? Do you feel like you have to be a certain way or not achieve a certain level of success so that you can be part of a group or a club as they say, or a tribe? And then taking that further, you know, with the suc you, you know, you have the success, and then you have the fear of actually what if happens if I achieved my dreams? And then there's also the perfectionism, right? So needing the things that you accomplish to almost be perfect, right? And so that perfectionism can impact how you spend your time and how you avoid doing those things because you want them done almost perfectly. And so that takes a lot of energy and there's a chance it won't be perfect. And so then you'd have to put something out in the world that wasn't perfect. And so what does that mean about you? I don't think it means anything, but I think there's something that you may be telling yourself about it. And so there's that, the fear, the fear of failure, the perfectionism. What will happen if I achieve my dreams? And the last one I wanna talk about today is the people pleasing. Okay? So people pleasing is, can occur when we feel like our needs are not as important, or we want the person, the people to like us, right? And so when you want someone to like you, you put their needs in front of you. You don't wanna say no to things. Um, and maybe you say yes a lot more often than you would like to some things, or maybe you've committed to some things in the past, and now you don't wanna do them, but you feel bad and you don't want, you know, you don't wanna upset people, right? So if you're empathic and sensitive, that's, that's, that's really a pitfall that a lot of us experience, right? We don't wanna hurt other people's feelings because we've been hurt before and we know how that feels, and we don't wanna be part of that, right? So there's a sense of, I don't wanna hurt another people's feelings. So the people pleasing pa behavior can get out of control, and that can impact how you spend your time, and then you're not focusing on what's really important to you, and then you're not achieving your goals, and then you're not getting things done. And then you're, you're, you're moving things over to the next day and the next day and the next day, and you feel like the year has passed and you haven't worked really on achieving the things that are really important to you. So if you are wanna stop this pattern, I'm gonna encourage you to take some of the steps I talked about today. So I'm gonna do a quick summary. Okay? So first I talked about, you know, you can use the external strategies to start to examine how you're spending your time by maybe working on some, uh, time blocking, prioritizing, or time tracking, so you can be really clear about how you're actually spending your time, and then looking at how you're spending your time and whether that matches your values. And if it doesn't, the way you're actually spending your time is, are your priorities, whether you like it or not, right? So it's time to switch that up, and you can use that when you're actually functioning in the world and ask yourself and remind yourself, oh, I'm doing the dishes right now even though I can do them in the evening because that feels like I, I have something that I've accomplished. So instead, what can I take on that's a higher priority for me that actually is taking me towards what is really important? Okay? So that's the way that you can use that. And then looking at what your beliefs are about time. Do you have a scarcity mindset? What are the words you use when you talk about time? What do you say? Okay, what are your fears that you have? Do you have fears of what will happen if you're successful and a lack of belonging? Do you have a fear of what will happen if you accomplish your dreams and actually succeed in them? Do you have some perfectionism or people pleasing that's impacting how you spend your time? All these inner pieces is if you don't address them, you can continue to take steps externally, but will, it'll work for a while and you'll go back to old patterns or it'll, you know, it'll work partly way. And then another way, you're, you know, you're a really smart person, right? Your brains are powerful. You'll figure out a way to make sure that the things that you actually believe are what you actually focus on. So this is Kavita with aligned and soulful success, encouraging you to focus on your dreams and accomplish your dreams. I'd love to hear from you. If you've received something valuable from today's episode, send me a message. There's a link in the show notes, and I will come to you next week. Next week, episode will continue on this idea of the inner game of entrepreneurship as an empath and conscious entrepreneur. In the meantime, take good care. Bye.
